Indeed, the biases documented here may create a barrier to the type of exchanges of information, and especially to the type of careful and respectful listening, that can go a long way to attenuating the feelings of frustration and resentment that accompany interpersonal and intergroup conflict.”, “The thing we want to learn about a stranger is fragile.

Some other memories of the funeral have stuck in my mind. We also like truck-stop breakfasts, large moving objects, Monday night football, and the missionary position. It’s the act of depressed people at a particular moment of extreme vulnerability and in combination with a particular, readily available lethal means.”, “The conviction that we know others better than they know us—and that we may have insights about them they lack (but not vice versa)—leads us to talk when we would do well to listen and to be less patient than we ought to be when others express the conviction that they are the ones who are being misunderstood or judged unfairly.”, “We are bad lie detectors in those situations when the person we’re judging is mismatched.”, “Defaulting to truth is a problem.

FreeBookNotes found 11 important quotes from

Seattle. In one Russian fable, a Holy Fool looks at a famous icon of the Virgin Mary and declares it the work of the devil. We will never know the whole truth. ...I had never been able to truly feel remorse for anything.

He asked me why I had put Maman in the home. The old boy’s face, for instance, when he caught up with us for the last time, just outside the village. All Quotes My mind was always on what was coming next, today or tomorrow. I wasn't even able to tell myself that it was hard to think those things. It was true, and yet I had wanted to. His family was Israeli, so he thought Tel Aviv. To view 4 Book Reviews for this book, visit our Talking to Strangers Quotes Showing 1-30 of 154 “You believe someone not because you have no doubts about them. It lets spies and con artists roam free.”, “Whatever it is we are trying to find out about the strangers in our midst is not robust.

Even there, in that home where lives were fading out, evening was a kind of wistful respite.

After that, everything seemed to happen so fast, so deliberately, so naturally that I don't remember any of it anymore. Same thing. Cincinnati. Ever."

Nothing mattered, and I knew why. When I was first imprisoned, the hardest thing was that my thoughts were still those of a free man. Mother used to say that however miserable one is, there’s always something to be thankful for. The Stranger. All Right Reserved.

. Chapter 10, Page 129, Deep Ellum boys? That's all for today, Monsieur Antichrist.

Those who are not part of existing social hierarchies are free to blurt out inconvenient truths or question things the rest of us take for granted.

But the alternative—to abandon trust as a defense against predation and deception—is worse.”, “Today we are now thrown into contact all the time with people whose assumptions, perspectives, and backgrounds are different from our own. And she usually went on to add that, like dogs, they all took up too much space on the bed, and they always went for the crotch.

GET HELP. Although actually, everyone is always a little guilty. He’s not wearing anything at all!” The little boy is a Holy Fool. The same convictions can make us reluctant to take advice from others who cannot know our private thoughts, feelings, interpretations of events, or motives, but all too willing to give advice to others based on our views of their past behavior, without adequate attention to their thoughts, feelings, interpretations, and motives. In Hans Christian Andersen’s famous children’s tale “The Emperor’s New Clothes,” the king walks down the street in what he has been told is a magical outfit. Throughout the whole absurd life I'd lived, a dark wind had been rising toward me from somewhere deep in my future, across years that were still to come, and as it passed, this wind levelled whatever was offered to me at the time. And the more I thought about it, the more I dug ut of memory things I had overlooked or forgotten. quotes with page numbers using the following version of the book: Smooth Talking Stranger, Macmillan, 2009 (352 pages).

And we stop believing only when our doubts and misgivings rise to the point where we can no longer explain them away.”, “In Boston right around the same time, another criminologist did a similar study: Half the crime in the city came from 3.6 percent of the city’s blocks. They laughed when they saw me. Chapter 10, Page 142, You can't stand between a Texan and his power tools.

But on top of those errors we add another, which pushes our problem with strangers into crisis. Talking to Strangers is about why we are so bad at that act of translation.”, “The closest we have to Holy Fools in modern life are whistleblowers.

If I can convince you of one thing in this book, let it be this: Strangers are not easy.”, “Because we do not know how to talk to strangers, what do we do when things go awry with strangers? Therefore, (and the difficult thing was not to lose sight of all the reasoning that went into this therefore), I had to accept the rejection of my appeal. From the dark horizon of my future a sort of slow, persistent breeze had been blowing toward me, all my life long, from the years that were to come. According to him, human justice was nothing and divine justice was everything.

. I wanted to tell her that it wasn't my fault, but I stopped myself because I remembered I'd already said that to my boss.